Quo Vadis

Director: Mervyn LeRoy
Year Released: 1951
Rating: 1.5

Having spent three years killing and pillaging, military officer Marcus Vinicius (Robert Taylor) and his soldiers return to Rome, which is under total control by the psychotic Emperor Nero (Peter Ustinov), and while there he falls in love with pacifist Lygia (Deborah Kerr) except she rejects his advances, and then Nero decides to burn the entire city down (claiming he's a "supreme artist"), blames the "sneaky" Christians and orders them to be fed to the lions (although I can't imagine we're that healthy a snack).  The first hour plus mostly consists of Vinicius creepily "pursuing" Lygia which I think is intended to be "romantic" even though Taylor, despite having a movie star's appearance, is devoid of any possible charisma, and then it briefly becomes thrilling when the Eternal City is on fire ... before reverting back to sanctimonious blather (to go along with the attractive sets and costumes).  Ustinov is a real treat as the Mad Fiddler - he helps make the hours pass - but his "lady friend" Poppaea (Patricia Laffan) is also dangerous: at one point she tells Marcus, "It's foolish to kill those you hate because once dead they're beyond pain...."  If that isn't an indication to tuck and run, I don't know what to tell you, son.